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Csonka’s WWE TLC 2017 Review

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OFFICIAL RESULTS– Kickoff Match: Sasha Banks defeated Alicia Fox @ 10:16 via acquiescence [**]– Asuka defeated Emma @ 9:23 via acquiescence [**½]– Cedric Alexander and Rich Swann defeated Jack Gallagher and Brian Kendrick @ 8:00 via pin [***]– WWE RAW Women’s Appellation Match: Champion Alexa Beatitude defeated Mickie James @ 11:27 via pin [***]– WWE Cruiserweight Appellation Match: Enzo Amore defeated Champion Kalisto @ 9:00 via pin [*½]– Finn Balor defeated AJ Styles @ 18:20 via pin [****]– Jason Jordan defeated Elias @ 8:50 via pin [**½]– TLC Match: Kurt Angle, Seth Rollins, & Dean Ambrose defeated The Miz, Sheamus, Cesaro, Braun Strowman, and Kane @ 35:30 via pin [***½]

– Hunt all of my reviews at this link.

– Elias will accomplish on the PPV tonight, he mocked Jason Jordan for not actuality on the PPV, which may advance to article tonight amid “daddy Kurt & son Jason.”

– Those bastards cut Drew Gulak’s time.

Sasha Banks vs. Alicia Fox: They go crazy bouncy to begin, Fox bails to the attic for a powder. Aback in and Fox attacks, they affray in the bend until Fox cuts off Banks and area the action. Banks bound battles back, lays in some arena and batter until Banks starts to bung her around. Fox wants a handshake, but eats a dropkick and rolls to the floor. Column break, Fox is in control; Banks up top and Fox tosses her to the floor. Fox follows with a aback breaker, and afresh rolls her aback in. They barter strikes, and Fox tosses her to the attic again. We get a countout tease, but Banks makes it aback in. Fox hits the arctic lights suplex for 2. She hits another, and that additionally gets 2. Fox afresh area things, but Banks makes a comeback, and counters a aback breaker for 2. Banks beatitude Fox to the floor. Aback in and Banks hits a arch scissors, knee bang and afresh runs into a aerial kick, with Fox accoutrement for 2. Fox throws a fit, misses the axe bang and Banks locks in the Banks account and Fox taps. Sasha Banks defeated Alicia Fox @ 10:16 via acquiescence [**] This was a accomplished bang off match, there was annihilation actually appropriate about it, but it was far from bad and they formed hard.

Asuka vs. Emma: Emma plays accumulate abroad to begin, and afresh talks shit. Asuka looks for a knee bar but Emma makes the ropes. She afield slaps Asuka, and looks to assignment the arm. Asuka picks up the pace, attacks the arm but Emma escapes. Emma slaps Asuka again, Asuka smiles and hits an ass attack. Asuka looks for an abate lock, but Emma escapes and dropkicks her to the floor. Emma rolls her aback in, slamming Asuka bottomward and stomping on her. Emma area the action, demography the heat. Asuka escapes with leg kicks, but Emma slams her bottomward again. Emma works her over in the corner, hits the active burst and covers for 2. Asuka is affairs way too abundant here. She boring tries to activity back, Emma slaps her and Asuka fires up and hits a sliding kick. The missile dropkick follows, and she afresh lays in afresh kicks. Emma fights back, hitting a sliding dropkick and accoutrement for 2. Emma takes ascendancy back, cutting Asuka’s face into the mat. Asuka locks in an abate lock, and afresh hits a trapped German suplex. Emma rolls to the floor, Asuka follows but Emma slams her to the floor. Aback in and Asuka hits a arch kick, and the Asuka lock and Emma taps. Asuka defeated Emma @ 9:23 via acquiescence [**½] This is the aforementioned bullshit, 50-50 bout they appointed for Ziggler & Nakamura, actually abrasive the advertising of Asuka. It actually wasn’t 50-450 as Asuka of all bodies formed from the basal adjoin Emma. It went way too long, Asuka awash way too abundant and annotation was actually no help. Cole’s annotation was such bits here, “Asuka is all about accepting fun and entertaining,” while Graves tries to put over her abomination and ascendant streak. This is not how you present a ascendant star; this is how you present “just addition affiliate of the roster.” The assignment was altogether fine, but it was additionally a absolute archetype of putting on the amiss bout for what it should accept been, which was authoritative Asuka attending special. It didn’t accept to be a squash, but the ambition was to accomplish Asuka attending special, and they actually bootless at accomplishing that. WWE needs to be authoritative stars, to accomplish bodies feel appropriate and they had that adventitious actuality but backward central their assurance absolute in agreement of booking. The capital takeaway I’ve apprehend about the bout was that “Emma looked acceptable and added aggressive than I would accept expected,” which agency they aren’t talking about Asuka.

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– Miz talks with his aggregation about tonight’s capital event. They all briefing Angle for putting himself into the match. Braun says to save the pep talk, because he affairs to booty out his opponents, as continued as they breach out of his way. Kane says he will do what he pleases. Miz promises abundant annihilation for all.

– Elias arrives to sing us a song. Someone starts throwing vegetables into the ring, and we see it’s Jason Jordan. Jordan leaves and the articulation ends afterwards a able song. Jason Jordan is a dick. This was 100% Vince McMahon there, who anticipation it was hilarious.

Jack Gallagher and Brian Kendrick vs. Cedric Alexander and Rich Swann: Gallagher has new angry man music. Swann and Kendrick into begin. Kendrick cuts him off about immediately, and tags in Gallagher, who bound area Swann. Swann picks up the pace, hits a dropkick and Alexander cleans house, sending the heels to the floor. Gallagher trips him up, but Swann cannonballs assimilate Gallagher on the floor. Alexander follows with a big dive, and afresh rolls Kendrick aback in. Swann & Alexander booty control, animate bifold teams on Kendrick and acrimonious up a abreast fall. Gallagher distracts Swann, acceptance Kendrick to tag out to Gallagher. Gallagher beats on Swann, and works quick tags with Kendrick, as they advance the calefaction on Swann. Swann manages to bung Kendrick to the floor, fights off Gallagher and Alexander gets the hot tag. Alexander runs agrarian on Gallagher, hits an enziguri and afresh the springboard clothesline, but Kendrick makes the save. Swann tries to advice but Kendrick takes him out. Aback in and Kendrick hits a superkick and captain’s angle on Alexander. Swann in and hits a Phoenix burst to breach it up. Swann and Gallagher booty anniversary added out, and Alexander hits the lumbar analysis on Kendrick for the win. Cedric Alexander and Rich Swann defeated Jack Gallagher and Brian Kendrick @ 8:00 via pin [***] this was a acceptable and fun aback and alternating match, actual enjoyable. It was appealing abundant all activity and the best affair on the appearance so far.

WWE RAW Women’s Appellation Match: Champion Alexa Beatitude vs. Mickie James: they alcove and James takes Beatitude bottomward and starts activity for covers, but Beatitude beatitude out. Beatitude runs to the ropes and James slaps her in the ass. Beatitude is pissed, hits a aback bend and slams James to the mat repeatedly, but James keeps kipping up and slams Beatitude down. James follows with a active kick, accoutrement for 2. Beatitude sends James to the accessory and starts to assignment the arm. Beatitude looks actual blessed as she works over James and talks shit. Beatitude maintains the heat, laying in beatitude and continues her advance on the arm. James keeps fighting, but Beatitude maintains ascendancy of the arm, accoutrement for 2. Beatitude lays the boots to her, absorption on the arm. James starts to blaze aback with kicks, hits the bend arch scissors and they barter slaps and go crazy fists. They both acreage beatitude and we get a bifold down. They barter strikes from their knees, James fires up with forearms and clotheslines. James follows with kicks, and covers for 2. James looks for a DDT, but ends up in a cycle up for 2.Bliss cuts her off and hits cipher red for a acceptable abreast fall. James hits the flapjack, active up top and Beatitude cuts her off and James avalanche assimilate the bad shoulder. Beatitude up top and askance beatitude misses! James aback up top, hits a missile dropkick and that gets 2. Beatitude runs into a kick, and James covers for 2 as the army chants for tables. Beatitude begs off, but afresh slams James to the buckles and hits the DDT to retain. Champion Alexa Beatitude defeated Mickie James @ 11:27 via pin [***] I anticipation that they formed a acceptable and acute aback and alternating match, with Beatitude acrimonious up a adamantine fought and apple-pie win. James put up a acceptable fight, but aloof didn’t accept abundant to booty the appellation tonight.

– James is interviewed column match, and says she formed adamantine and was appreciative of her performance. She hopes to get addition attempt and acknowledgment the fans.

– Ambrose & Rollins accommodated with Angle, and he knows that they capital to do this themselves, but he will accord them whatever he has larboard tonight. They accord Angle a Shield belong and say he’s in all the way tonight.

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– Elias is back. The army keeps arresting him, so he keeps starting over. Jason Jordan arrives and throws added vegetables at him. What a dick.

– Enzo’s articulation sounds attempt as he does his accepted shtick, but says that his articulation is the alone affair he’s accident tonight.

– We annihilate some time and accommodated the all-embracing advertise teams.

WWE Cruiserweight Appellation Match: Champion Kalisto vs. Enzo Amore: Enzo runs to the ropes at the bell, attractive for safety. They lock up with Enzo advancing the affectation and hitting a aback elbow. Enzo does his ball and Kalisto chases him to the floor. Aback in and Kalisto works leg kicks, and afresh sends Enzo to the attic with an Enziguri. Kalisto follows with a suicide dive, and aback in Enzo runs afresh and active to the apron. Kalisto looks to attack, but Enzo trips him up assimilate the buckles. Enzo lays the boots to him, hits a ancillary bang and covers for 2. Enzo now follows with arena and pound, and afresh looks abashed as he tries to assignment the arm. Kalisto fights back, hitting a rolling kick. Enzo cuts off a Kalisto allegation with a barge and awning for 2. Enzo now area the activity with a ancillary headlock. Kalisto approved to activity to his anxiety and does, slamming Enzo to the corner. Kalisto to the apron, hits an enziguri and follows with a built-in senton and acicular RANA. The awning gets 2 as Enzo makes the ropes. Enzo slams Kalisto to the buckles, countering salida del sol, and hits the DDG for a abreast fall. Kalisto fights off the body food, Enzo looks to run but grabs the arena skirt. This leads to an eye blow and Enzo hits body aliment for the win. Enzo Amore defeated Champion Kalisto @ 9:00 via pin [*½] This was a actually collapsed bout with abutting to no calefaction and Enzo acceptable the appellation aback as best predicted. The quick appellation changes accept happened too abundant to accomplish me affliction about them in any way.

– Enzo gets the column bout promo, thanking himself for the win and leaves.

Finn Balor vs. AJ Styles: The army is into this big time alike afore the alarm rang. We alike get “too sweet” chants. They lock up, animate a apathetic and added methodical alpha than you may expect. But if they are activity continued it makes sense. They aces up the pace, animate aback and alternating until Balor follows up with strikes. Into the all-embracing and Styles hits the dropkick, Balor battles aback and hits an enziguri and takes Styles down, animate a Romero special. Styles escapes, and Balor keeps him grounded, animate the legs. Styles hits a aback elbow, and follows with a suplex. The knee bead follows, and Styles covers for 2. They accept a abundant army here, Styles hits a ballista acquaint bang and covers for 2. Balor tries to activity back, but Styles cuts him off with a ancillary aback breaker. Styles maintains control, animate over Balor in the bend but Balor fires up and lays in strikes. Balor follows with chops, but Styles answers back. Balor lays in accelerated strikes, added chops and as Styles active up top, Balor hits an enziguri, sending him to the floor. Balor afresh follows with a candied tope. Aback in and Balor hits bung blade, but Styles hits the ushigoroshi and we get a bifold down. Balor fights off the Styles clash, but Styles hits a barrow face bulb for 2. Balor cuts off Styles, lays the boots to him and afresh hits a active dropkick in the corner. Styles manages to cycle into the dogie crusher, but Balor slams Styles’ arch to the mat and manages to escape. Styles looks for the springboard forearm, but Balor stops that by advance him to the floor. Balor hits the accessory PK, and follows with a shotgun dropkick, sending Styles to the barricade. Balor looks to picks Styles up instead of demography a countout, and Styles tackles him over the advertise table. They exhausted the calculation and aback in, and afresh bang for the bifold down. They get aback to their anxiety and barter strikes centermost ring, Balor hits the PELE and both men are down. Balor gets to his anxiety first, they action for position into a alternation of counters and Balor hits 1916 for a abreast fall. Balor hits the shotgun dropkick to the corner, active up top but eats a PELE! Styles afresh hits a springboard RANA and that gets a abundant abreast fall. Styles now misses the springboard 450, Balor kills him with a braiding and shotgun dropkick. Balor up top, the bifold barge hits and Balor wins! Finn Balor defeated AJ Styles @ 18:20 via pin [****] These two had a abundant match, which is a acclaim to their abilities as this was aftermost minute, and Styles had to do a lot of biking to get to TLC. They had a abundant crowd, they played to them, accomplishing their brand being and accept us a apple-pie and acceptable catastrophe for their aboriginal match. Now brainstorm how acceptable this will be aback they get a able altercation (not accusatory here, WWE was in a bad spot), some TV time and additionally time to assignment calm on the alley and these two will actually annihilate it bottomward the line.

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– Column match, they agitate easily and allotment a too sweet. #GoodBrothers

Elias vs. Jason Jordan: They lock up and Jordan overpowers Elias to begin, application abecedarian throws. Elias gets pissed, gets airtight bottomward afresh and bails to the floor. Aback in and Elias takes control, accomplishments Jordan and animate the arm. Booker is aback to shitting on Jordan on commentary. Jordan catches Elias with a active slam, and afresh dropkicks him to the apron, pulls him aback in and covers for 3. Elias cuts off the suplex, knees Jordan to the buckles and afresh beats him bottomward in the corner. Elias slams him off of the accessory as he continues his control. aback in and Elias covers for 2. Clotheslines follow, and Elias covers afresh for 2. Elias slows things, animate an belly stretch. Jordan escapes, fires aback and slams Elias to the buckles afresh to no reaction. Jordan follows with a belly-to-belly, and bend spear. The Saito suplex follows for 2. Jordan takes Elias up top, Elias fights him off and hits a knee strike, and slams him into the buckles and Jordan sells the knee abrasion now. Jordan counters a suplex into a cycle up for the win but Elias was blame out at 3. Jason Jordan defeated Elias @ 8:50 via pin [**½] They were put in the afterlife spot, no one cared, but they formed adamantine and had a altogether boilerplate able angry match.

TLC Match: Kurt Angle, Seth Rollins, & Dean Ambrose vs. The Miz, Sheamus, Cesaro, Braun Strowman, and Kane: Angle does the Shield access with Rollins & Ambrose, not alone is Angle accepting to battle cool, but I dig the unified entrance. The Shield runs agrarian at the bell, demography out Braun and Kane with armchair shots. Rollins and Ambrose hunt with dives and afresh the Shield advance with ladders on the floor. Angle afresh attacks Braun with ladder shots, Ambrose and Rollins assignment over Kane as the Shield runs wild. Angle joins in with ladder shots to Kane, and now they annihilate the advertise table. Sheamus and Cesaro acknowledgment to cut them off, but the Shield will accept none of that. They go aback afterwards Kane, lay him on the table and Braun makes the save. Rollins saves Angle as he and Ambrose assignment over Braun with armchair shots. They column Braun a few times, and lay him on an advertise table. Kane is additionally still on a table and the Shield set up ladders. Ambrose and Rollins ascend and put the monsters through the tables! Rollins is benign his knee afterwards that, and Angle now beats on Miz with a armchair and rolls him aback in but Cesaro and Sheamus cut him off. They alpha to exhausted bottomward Angle, and afresh accompany in a ladder and bang it into the ribs of Angle. Miz and accompany aggravate the Shield bomb, but Ambrose and Rollins accomplish the save. Angle starts to hit Germans on Miz, Germans for Sheamus & Cesaro! Oh shit, Kane is aback and active aback into the ring. Angle activity off the chokeslam and locks in the abate lock but Braun makes the save and slams Angle to the barricade. Braun sets up a table, and powerslams Angle through it! Trainers are out to analysis on Angle, as the others abide to brawl. Aggregation Miz works over Rollins & Ambrose with armchair shots. Aback in the arena and it’s all Aggregation Miz as Angle is helped to the back. Aggregation Miz continues to assignment over the actual Shield and additionally booty appear time to celebrate. Cesaro lays in armchair shots, and it looks bad for our babyfaces. Rollins and Ambrose dig abysmal and blaze up, Kane accidentally hit Braun with a chair; he knows he fucked up. Braun is pissed as Miz tries to accumulate the peace. They accomplish nice for now, assault bottomward Ambrose and Rollins again. They set up a table, and the Bar hit a bifold crucifix bomb but I AM THE TABLE doesn’t break. Braun afresh tosses Ambrose through the table as they set it up in the corner. They annoyance Rollins to the date as a debris barter arrives. They accept Ambrose as able-bodied and attending to bung them into the truck. They bung them in, but Rollins & Ambrose activity out and dive off assimilate the accumulation to clean out Kane, Braun & The Bar. Miz tries to run, but Ambrose & Rollins hunt him bottomward and attack. They booty Miz to the date and set up tables. Kane makes the save, but he gets bifold teamed and afresh Braun makes the save. Kane afresh attacks Braun, and chokeslams him off the date and through a belvedere abutting to the advertise table. Kane has no time for your shit. Braun is still alive, so Kane yanks bottomward the cord of blind chairs and buries Braun with them. Kane now grabs Ambrose, but he and Rollins advance and try to activity him off. The Miz fails to accomplish the save and gets exhausted bottomward until Kane chokeslams Rollins & Ambrose through tables. Sheamus & Cesaro are alive, and annoyance Rollins & Ambrose over to the debris truck, but BRAUN is still alive. This puzzles Kane. Braun takes out Miz, Sheamus, & Cesaro and attacks Kane. Braun beatitude the bits out of his aggregation until Aggregation Miz assemblage attacks him and they bung him into the debris barter and “it compacts and crushes him” And drives away. How abounding murders on WWE programming this year does that make? And bodies say Lucha Underground dead a lot of people. Aback to the arena as Miz, Kane, and the Bar attending to accomplishment things off. they run through accelerated blaze moves on Rollins, but Ambrose makes the save. he gets cut off but Kurt Angle’s music hits and our Olympic hero has accustomed to accomplish the save. SUPLEXES and ANGLE SLAMS on the floor. Cesaro gets put through a table, and her takes out Miz, Kane cuts him off, but Ambrose saves Angle and they exhausted bottomward Kane. Rollins and Ambrose extra Kane through the barricade, Miz comes aback in and hits a skull-crushing afterpiece but Angle beatitude out. Miz throws a fit. Angle afresh locks in the abate lock on Miz, and Miz escapes, blame Angle to the floor. Angle, Rollins & Ambrose beleaguer Miz, knee strike, bedraggled accomplishments and Angle bang all hit on Miz. The Shield bomb follows and Miz is done.Kurt Angle, Seth Rollins, & Dean Ambrose defeated The Miz, Sheamus, Cesaro, Braun Strowman, and Kane @ 35:30 via pin [***½] This feels like one of those matches that I will charge to watch a few times afore I can appear to a solid cessation as to what I thought. Seeing Angle aback was a ton of fun and the aboriginal 10-minutes of the bout were awesome, but afresh it acutely slowed and became anticipated in a bad way. Kane got in way too abundant and it acquainted like he was presented as the star. Angle got taken out, we got the “trainers to the aback spot,” Kane and Braun angry on anniversary other, Rollins & Ambrose survived the aggression that went way too long, we got extra through the barricade spot, and Angle assuredly fabricated the save for the feel acceptable moment. They abounding the spots on the TLC bingo card. That doesn’t accomplish it bad, because it was fun and chaotic, but it acquainted as if it bare to be edited as the final third was really, actually lethargic. I am abiding some admired this added than I did.

– End scene.

– Acknowledgment for reading.

~GLORIOUS~

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