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It’s the average of winter, and affairs are you’re anxious for the day back you can biking abroad from the burghal and aperture up at the cottage already again. Green trees, accord and quiet, acclaim lapping waves, loons…ahhhh. Can you feel your amateur blurred already?

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Just so that summer cottage fantasy doesn’t drive you too crazy, we’ve appear up with 50 things about the cottage that can drive you nuts. Maybe burghal activity ain’t so bad afterwards all…

1. Noise (however you ascertain that) at inappropriate times (however you ascertain that).

2. Neighbours who accumulate you up with their stereo arena until 2 a.m., beddy-bye until noon, again accuse that you woke them up back you started up your baiter for a lunchtime fishing trip.

3. Lawnmowers afore 8 a.m.

4. Back your neighbour’s megawatt motion-sensitive exoteric ablaze is aimed appropriate at your bedchamber window.

5. The amaranthine action to accumulate the bank outside. (Try befitting a basin of baptize by the aperture and a austere “no shoes inside” policy.)

6. Finding amplitude to adhere yet addition wet towel.

7. Guests who accept that there’s an amaranthine accumulation of towels and toilet paper.

8. Guests who debris to accede with the “If it’s yellow, let it mellow” guideline—or who contrarily assert on alleviative your aerial catchbasin arrangement as admitting it were a burghal toilet.

9. Guests who appearance up with no aliment or drinks.

10. Guests who delay until everyone’s sat bottomward to a big spaghetti-and-meatballs banquet to acquaint you that they’re gluten-free vegetarians.

11. Guests who debris to accompany your family’s cottage traditions, whether you authority bathtub regatta, crossword addle competitions, or cribbage marathons.

12. Guests who don’t offer to baker a meal, do a amount of dishes, ambit the attic or accomplish their own bed.

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13. Guests who teach your kids how to accomplish the ultimate blockhead call, which you again apprehend all day, every day—for the blow of the summer.

14. Guests.

15. “I’m bored.”

16. The mosquitoes that ruin bonfires, conceiving sessions, and midnight angular dips.

17. The wasps that accomplish it absurd to eat alfresco after haz-mat suits.

18. The squirrels that lay decay to your new birdfeeder (no amount how ample the words “Squirrel-proof” were on the box).

19. A backing day and a houseful of kids who can’t comedy lath amateur for added than 10 account after starting World War III—and a cottage too baby to put anniversary of them in abstracted rooms.

20. A backing day and a toddler.

21. A backing day back the wine has run out.

22. Four after backing canicule during your one anniversary of summer holidays.

23. The mucky, angular arena you accept to attack through to alpha swimming.

24. Trying to plan your holidays about anybody else, so you can adore a little quiet time at the ancestors cottage.

25. The party-loving association beyond the basin who don’t apprehend that complete campaign bigger over baptize than over acreage (and don’t allure you to the party).

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26. “What do you mean, the bathroom’s outside?”

27. The bedfellow who guzzles your ability microbrews, again replaces them with bargain stuff.

28. Parents who smile indulgently at their screaming, destructive, unsupervised accouchement and say, “Isn’t it nice that they’re cogent themselves?”

29. Pet owners who accept that you’d be blessed to host their aging, incontinent, socially maladjusted gluten-free vegetarian St. Bernard in your one-room cabin.

30. ATVs disturbing up the hiking trails.

31. Hikers who blissfully—and obliviously—amble forth the ATV trails.

32. Snowmobilers who ruin clean-cut cross-country routes.

33. Cross-country skiers who won’t get out of the way of snowmobiles.

34. The (invited) bedfellow who brings forth their (uninvited) girlfriend/ne’er-do-well brother/newly single-and-despondent buddy.

35. The neighbours who acquiesce their dog to roam free—and the dog who chooses your backyard as its bathroom.

36. The fishing baiter that decides to dump its bare allurement (or angle guts) eight anxiety from your dock.

37. Spending four (or six, or eight) hours to bright the snow from your driveway, stairs and roof, alone to accept it snow addition four anxiety overnight.

38. The connected aliment appropriate aloof to accumulate the roof from leaking, the baiter afloat, and the afford racoon-free

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39. Spending the summer squirrel-proofing your cottage, alone to access the abutting year to acquisition they’ve stored a winter’s account of basics in your oven.

40. Anyone who hogs the binoculars/pool noodle/only unchipped coffee cup.

41. The neighbour from beyond the basin who insists on accomplishing jet ski doughnuts eight anxiety from your beach.

42. The neighbours who set off firecrackers on accidental weekends.

43. Leeches (unless you’re hunting for bait).

44. Running out of food (allergy meds, hot dogs, wine) accidentally back the abutting abundance is an hour away.

45. Climbing out of the baiter at your island berth alone to ascertain you larboard the advanced aperture keys in your car.

46. The bound beer alternative at the bounded LCBO outlet.

47. Those guys who bead ballast a bald two metres abroad from the atom area you’re fishing.

48. Sitting in an amaranthine drive-through band in adjustment to sit in an amaranthine cartage jam on your way out the city.

49. Getting to the end of a adored summer weekend and acumen that you spent it alive harder than you do in the city.

50. Never activity like you’ve spent abundant time at the cottage.

Who are we kidding? We adulation the cottage!

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